I made a new friend in the market when Mr. Bear stole Mistress's charge card to go buy dirty magazines. His name is Kay. He hangs out with Miss Aolani a lot.

We talked about sharing. Kay said sharing brings people closer. Mr. Bear doesn't like to share at all. He says that the only way he wants to bring people closer is through experimental plastic surgery. Mr. Bear wants to make artificial Siamese twins using hobos. Kay didn't know what a hobo was, but he understood that experimental surgery hurts. Funny huh? Mr. Bear got in trouble when we got home because he wouldn't share the dirty magazines with Mistress.

I'm still trying to convince Mistress to let me raise demon bunnies. I told her we could keep them in the Garden of Despair. She asked me what Herbert thought of that idea.

Herbert says that demon bunnies and giant snakes are natural en'mies. I think it might be cool to watch them have death matches. I wonder who would win?

Despite being made of stone plants the Garden of Despair isn't empty of life. There are lots of creepy crawlies living in there. My favorites are the giant snakes.

I like to wrestle naked with Herbert the Anaconda, who is their king. His scales tickle. He's really strong but once in a while he lets me win.

Mr. Mask can't seem to stay out of trouble. Mistress let me go see the fights in the building they call the Outback. Mr. Mask got kicked so hard by a pretty lady his head near popped off!

Luckily the pretty lady was a super fancy nurse. She even has a nurse costume too! I helped her bring Mr. Mask back to life by giving him pufferfish kisses like I saw Mr. Hasselhoff do on Baywatch. Then we went home and had cherry pie.

The fish market is a very dangerous place. I went there to buy some tuna and got attacked by penguins dressed like pirates!

They tied me up with their ropes and threatened to whack me with a herring! I escaped and luckily Mr. Aukai was at the tea shop to untie me. Mr. Aukai's pretty cool when he's not snogging someone.

I wrote a letter to Mr. Franco today. He has his own blog too!

I sent him a picture I drew of him. I went and read his blog till my eyeballs were fit to pop right outta my skull, and mistress yelled at me to turn the computer off and go to bed. I didn't turn it off because Mr. Bear wanted to look for a russian mail order bride, but I did go to bed.

Mistress invited our new friends and some of their friends to a party at our place. Mistress keeps this really cool secret space under the lair that she calls The Underground.

In The Underground there is this really awesome maze made all of stone plants and stone people. I call it the garden of despair because people cry in there a lot. Mistress said we could do dancing there. I already picked out a new party dress. It's blue like my eyes and has bows on the shoulders.